RaceCafe..#1...Tipsters Thread.... Share Your Fancies For Fun...Lets See Who The Best Tipsters Here Are.
Mikie

Today's meeting

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If the Organised Crime Unit had any spare microphones after Inca

Knock Knock (10.30am-ish)

Are you free Dean?

Not really Phoebe, I have to go see Bernard, apart from those delicious sausage rolls he has Apple Turnovers today. Why, what do you want?

(Phoebe) Those guys from HRNZ are here to see you, they have an appointment at 10.40am, I wrote it in your Diary

Damn Phoebe, I haven't had time to look at today's Diary. Who is here?

(Phoebe) There's a Ken, a Colin and a guy I've never heard of before, he's Peter or Paul (or Mary) or something

(Dean) You mean Phil? The golfer?

(Phoebe) Tautarangi?

No Phoebe, aw hell, his last name escapes me. I'm sure it's Phil but I'll cover, I'll just call him buddy while he's here. But you'll need to cover for me, I'll slip out the back and see Bernard, tell them I'm on a conference call with Paddy Power and Winston and that I'll be free by 11am

(Phoebe) No worries Dean

.......

.....

.....

11.30am

(Dean) Come in, come in Ken, Colin and buddy, how are you. Sorry for the delay. Busy times, busy times. You know how it goes. Tell me, what can I do for you?

(Ken) Well Dean, we're here about this Forbury lot. 

(Dean) I see, I see

.........

Silence

Embarrassing silence

(Dean) Well, what about them?

(Ken) Well, you know, we consulted them by ringing them twice and we told them they can't race any more and when the Dates came out RITA gave them another 10 race days. We look like eggsThen to make it worse we gave every Club our submissions so they all knew we looked like eggs. Then we issued a Release saying we were caught by surprise by them getting dates which back-fired a bit, made us look like were eggs who didn't know what was happening. 

(Dean) Ah I see. I remember now. We didn't make you look like eggs on purpose guys. Bernard rang me on Thursday about Avondale and the Forbury dates were a consequence of that phone call

(Ken) But we didn't know Dean, and now we've told everyone we didn't know, so now like I said, we look like eggs

(Dean) Not on purpose Ken, not on purpose. Just horrible timing, Bernard called me on a Thursday and buddy wasn't due back at work until Wednesday so we were stuffed, couldn't give you any warning

(Colin) Fair enough Dean, we understand. We have fixed this moving forward, if you want to get hold of Phil on a Friday or a Monday you can ring the Golf Club and leave a message, Phil has said he will be only too happy to call you back after his round ends

(Dean) Well, that's decent of you buddy, that will make things easier moving forward. Anything else?

(Ken) Well yes Dean, on the way in we saw Bernard and we had a chat about Code funding. He said he has done his best for us but the most he can let us have is 18.5% of what you've allocated.

(Dean) Isn't that enough chaps?

(Colin) Well Dean, it means we will have to run races for under $6000 quite a lot

(Dean) Well, that doesn't sound too bad Colin, $6000 is a decent winning stake

(Colin) No, no Dean. $6000 total stake

(Dean) Buga, that sounds low, what should we do about it?

.........

...........

.............

Embarrassing silence

(pHIL) Eureka, I've got it guys. We will ask some Clubs to race without any funding which will leave more for other Clubs

(Ken) Ummm, Phil, you thought of that a couple of weeks ago. The Clubs didn't think it would work. Remember?

......

......

.......

(Phil) Eureka, I've got it. We will slash the number of races by 50%, that will meant the funding for the remaining 50% will double. Then the stakes will go up

(Ken, Colin) Wow, no wonder you can do the CEO's job in 2/5th's of the time anyone else can Phil. You're a bloody genius

(Dean) Okayyyyyyy

 

 

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