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rdytdy last won the day on January 10

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  1. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    The real differences between National & Labour: Part one by Guest Post It’s easy to look at both main political parties by applying the broad brush approach and coming to the conclusion there is not much to differentiate between them. On a day to day basis, it is often the case that we conclude that National would not have executed a particular policy much differently to Labour, or would not change a specific policy, hence the term Labour-lite. There are however real differences and they are becoming more apparent by the day due; mainly to the level of inexperience, incompetence and sheer ineptness of the Coalition of Losers. These people are so hopeless one would be reluctant to run the risk of letting them loose in a brewery to pour a drink. The most important difference between National and Labour is that National believes in personal responsibility and in providing the means whereby there is an incentive for people who want to succeed. Compare that to what we are witnessing from this government. They are simply applying their political philosophy. In reality, it is very different from National’s. Negligent spending of money. No hand ups, only handouts leading to a complete lack of personal and parental responsibility. They are implementing policies National wouldn’t even dream about. Let’s look at some of the major portfolio areas: FINANCE (easy one) National – believes in taking less from the taxpayer . Labour – TAX TAX TAX TAX TAX TA… WELFARE National – Had mechanisms in place to make people on benefits accountable. Had to actively look for a job. Penalties for not naming the father of the child. Labour – All restrictions gone. No responsibilities whatsoever. Then they wonder why Shane can’t get the nephews and others off the couch. The numbers on welfare have increased. Poverty has increased. All numbers in this area have increased. What a surprise! All in the name of a kind, caring government bringing in a ‘Wellbeing’ Budget. EDUCATION National – Embraced Charter schools which specifically helped those in the lower socioeconomic groups where the state system had failed them. Students had all the basics paid for including uniforms. Labour – Told what to do by their Union paymasters so to hell with the kids, got rid of Charter schools and put the students back in the system that failed them in the first place. Brilliant! All in the name of a kind and caring government bringing in a wellbeing Budget. HYPOCRITES! HOUSING National – Revised the state housing stock and replaced some to make more economic use of the land to more speedily accommodate those on the housing list. Labour – KIWIBUILD! A concept doomed to failure from the outset. How did they ever think it would work? They’ve ended up with houses at prices not much different to the open market, but with restrictions. Adrian Orr is now saying if Kiwibuild did take off it would restrict the number of houses that the private sector can build due to manpower and other shortages. Phil Twyford disputes that – saying Kiwibuild will add to the numbers being built. Really? How can he possibly come to that conclusion? He’s adding when he should be subtracting. Phil should stick to state housing as that’s what a kind and caring government introducing a wellbeing Budget should be doing.
  2. rdytdy

    Matamata 100 Years of Racing

    Fred Beguely - Kiwi Can Kevin Old - Persuasion, Seven Forty Seven Jack McGreal - Battle Eve Ray Vincent - Free Gold
  3. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    Simon and Cindy are in a bar at the airport.
Simon leans over, and with a smile on his face, says, “I must say it’s most unusual, but the media are really tearing you apart for that scandal.”Cindy: “You mean my continuing to lie about Stroubek?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the massive voter fraud by accepting the anointment from Winston?”Simon: “No, the other one.Cindy: “You mean the military not getting their pay rise?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Using my secret private phone to hide my activities?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “The nurses and cops not getting their full pay rise despite our promise?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Using that plane at taxpayers expense to fly to the islands all by myself?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean going back on our election promise of being the most transparent govt ever?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Giving the islands millions of taxpayers dollars while the poor at home suffer?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean signing the TPP despite being against it when in opposition?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean all the lies that I told, trying to protect the useless Clare Curran?”Simon: “No the other one:”Cindy: “The appointment of that “Rich Prick, Call me Sir” Cullen to the tax working group?”Simon: “No the other one:”Cindy: “Pissing off the Australians?”Simon: “No the other one:”Cindy: “you mean my captains call to stop all off shore exploration”Simon: “No the other one:”Cindy: “Overturning the tax cuts that were legislated for before the election?”Simon: “No the other one:”Cindy: “The waste of 1.2 billion of taxpayers money by giving free university attendance?”Simon: “No the other one:”Cindy: “ Defending IL-G in his coverup over his support of the lawnmower seller ”imon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Giving Wristy Jones his 3 billion slush fund?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me allowing one of my ministers husband to profit from contracts to do with her portfolio?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me hiding behind the courts in not taking responsibility for the youth abuse at the labour camp. Wood you agree?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me agreeing to waste 35 million on the entry to the Pike River mine drift?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me using the top cop to warn off any criticism of my boyfriend?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me agreeing with Twitford that we can build 10,000 homes per year?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me agreeing with Winston to plant 100 million trees per year?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Me thinking that by passing a law we can stop suicides?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my letting the Maori caucus run rough shod over me and making me support megafightery, despite her physical assault of her staff?”Simon: “No, the other one.Cindy: “Me agreeing with Winston to hide from the voters our secret agreement?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Signing the UN accord that will allow even more ferals into New Zealand?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “Signing a migration compact that aligns us with Brussels?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my releasing the emails just before I went overseas that prove I am a liar and that I did make ILG change his decision regarding Stroubek?”Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean all my denials that Hardcore and I are not mates is proven to be yet another lie?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my denials about all my texts to and from known criminals?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my acceptance of Twitfords constant fuckups with his Kiwibuild/Kiwibuy policy?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the COL changing the rules and making it easier for unemployed ferals to continue getting the benefit without any sanctions on those who don’t seek work?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my reply when asked how I take my coffee, I wanted to say intravenously?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my Govt saying any business giving out plastic carry bags may be fined $100,000, when at the same time a drug dealer gets a free pass to stay in NZ?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the “recalibration “ of our Kiwibuild targets to deflect how useless we are at getting 10,00 houses built in each year?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean declining to support our allies when they asked over Venezuela's new leader?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean at the iwi chair forum when I announced anther 4 million payment to yet another iwi group to duplicate the work already done by another iwi?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my dead silence and not helping the Indian students after I promised to help, should Labour win the 2017 election?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean despite my saying “the first year is on me”and free fees from the taxpayer, student numbers at university have fallen?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean stopping us using our own coal, but when there is a need for it, we import dirty coal from Indonesia?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean having my back office in a state of flux, with a number of key staff leaving and forcing others to reapply for their jobs as a result of so called restructuring?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my Govt giving the Natives up north $100 million, to spend as they see fit, when pharmac cannot afford to pay for much needed cancer drugs?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: You mean my not ruling out a red meat tax in New Zealand, despite the Associate Health Minister Julie Anne Genter saying simply that it was not under consideration “at this stage”?Simon: “no the other oneCindy: “You mean when asked, did I know the principles of the Treaty, I had to admit I did not know in spite of previously telling Maori that I learnt them at school.Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean when Suzie asked me how many Maori Children our policies had lifted out of poverty. I had to say I didn’t know because no one is collecting any information?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the Government’s Provincial Growth Fund (PGF), designed to create jobs and boost the regions, has only created 54 jobs in Wellington and spent just $26.6 million of its $3 billion?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean my saying unemployment had gone down, when it had actually gone up 10,000?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean when I set a goal during the election that we would reduce suicides, and since then have silently let it slip under the radar?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the mental health hui with no doi?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the mental heath hui to doi the first hui with no doi?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean the final mental health hui to doi what the first hui should doi but didn’t doi?Simon: “No, the other one.”Cindy: “You mean getting the IRD to run a survey on new Zealanders political leanings just before the release of crucial tax reform report?Simon: “No, the other one”Cindy: “You mean making the announcement that we will be smoke free from 2025, but forgetting about cannabis smoke?Cindy: “You mean when I was given the cold shoulder by China and a major tourism promotion is also postponed by China.?Simon: “No, the other one”Cindy: “You mean when my MP’s couldn’t even get to their committees on time.?Simon: “No, the other one”Cindy: “You mean when I promised to build Auckland's light rail by 2021 and now have to admit yet again that I lied.?Simon: “No, the other one”Cindy: “You mean when I got Phil Twitford to say any promise I made as Labours leader is different to those made as the Silly little girl PM.?Simon: “No, the other one”Cindy: “You mean by taking the fuel tax in Auckland to pay for the rail project that is now not happening and still screwing Aucklanders in the process.?Simon: “No, the other one”Cindy: “I give up! … Oh wait, I think I’ve got it!: “You mean when I lied before the election that we will bring rail back between Auckland, Hamilton and Tauranga ,within 18 months of taking office?.Simon: “THAT’S IT! I almost forgot about that
  4. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    LEMON PICKERS NEEDED IN THE BAY OF PLENTY - ONLY NEW ZEALAND CITIZENS OR LEGAL IMMIGRANTS NEED APPLY:“Lemon Pickers Needed” read the ad in the newspaper.Ms. Sally Mulligan of Te Aro, Wellington, read it, and decided to apply for one of the jobs that most New Zealanders are not willing to do.She submitted her application for a job in a Bay of Plenty lemon grove, but seemed far too qualified for the job. She has a Humanities and Social Sciences degree from Massey University, and a master’s degree in Sociology - Gender and Sexuality studies from Victoria University in Wellington. For a number of years, she had worked as a social worker, and also as a school teacher in Auckland.The foreman studied her application, frowned and said, "I see that you are well educated, and have an impressive resume. However, I have to ask you, have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?”"Well, as a matter of fact, I have," she said..."I've been divorced three times, owned a Nissan Leaf, was a member of Auckland Peace Action, and voted for Jacinda and the Labour Party.” She started work yesterday.
  5. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    Now Jacinda offends India by Christie Jacinda Ardern cracking Photoshopped image credit: Luke Will someone please explain to me why we seem to be determined to offend most of our allies and all of our trading partners? Jacinda can write gushing letters of solidarity to Europe, ignoring the fact that we fought in two world wars on the opposite side of some powerful EU members, but when it comes to basic diplomacy, this government seems to have lost its way completely. The ongoing conflict between India and Pakistan in the Kashmir region resulted in the deaths of 45 Indian troopers and most of our western allies quickly came forward to condemn the attack. Unfortunately, we did not. quote. Most of the world came out quickly to condemn the horrific attack. quote. Why could we not issue a statement similar to that? Have we really fallen so far that we cannot send a message of sympathy to a friendly country that has suffered such a horrific attack, particularly as so many people of Indian descent now live in New Zealand? quote. China can manage an appropriate response, but somehow we cannot? quote. The Russians can manage it as well. So can the EU, Canada, Australia, Indonesia and Saudi Arabia. quote. Jacinda has been called out on her ‘kindness’. The whole world can now see that this is simply empty rhetoric, designed to make her look good, but nothing more. There has been talk in the past of an FTA with India and, if relations with China have soured, as it so appears, then India could have provided a new source of trade for our exports. It is quite clear, however, that India feels that New Zealand treats it with marked disinterest and this snub shows that feeling to be justified. So now Jacinda has upset the USA, Australia, China and India. But don’t worry, comrades. She didn’t recognise the new government of Venezuela. Now we truly know the company that we keep.
  6. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    No one entered Waikato Kiwibuild ballot by Christie Photoshopped image credit: Lushington Brady. Did nobody do any research, before Kiwibuild was established, to find out where there actually is a housing shortage? Firstly, Kiwibuild houses cannot be sold in Wanaka, meaning they will not go to families ‘locked out’ of the housing market. Now, nobody – yes, nobody – has entered the ballot to buy ANY of the homes in a Waikato development. This is truly breathtaking. quote. Where are all those young families clamouring at the door to get into a home of their own? Clearly, they do not live in the Waikato. quote. Registering interest is one thing, but buying a home is quite another. A lot of conditions have to be met before people can buy a property, and those conditions are the same for Kiwibuild houses as for other houses. Truth is, that once everything is taken into account, Kiwibuild houses are not the special deal they were purported to be. In many parts of the country, they are not a good deal at all. quote. Excuse me while I laugh… except there’s a lot of taxpayer’s money involved in this project. quote. Is it? Not in the Waikato. Not in Wanaka. Not in Te Kauwhata. quote.
  7. rdytdy

    For what its worth....

    Good listen:
  8. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    Ardern and Twyford are ideological idiots with absolutely no business experience. Would anyone have handed power to the to these inexperienced idealists to run a company? You bet not!! But here they are, running the country with inexperience and absolute ideology in charge of billions. What's happening to the 10 ten cent tax on regional fuel taxes in Auckland? The prime minister’s promise that isn’t a promise by Suze Photoshopped image credit: Technomage When is a promise not a promise? According to Phil Twyford, a promise Ardern made before she became prime minister doesn’t count as one. Why is that, you ask? Well, silly, Ardern wasn’t prime minister at the time was she? This is a doozy of an excuse from dear ol’ Phil, who would do his public persona a huge favour by putting a sock in his mouth. And is there a reason Ardern’s minders keep running interference for her whenever pressure is applied over her non-delivery? Quote. That promise could have been sidelined because Labour was already assured of votes from the fast growing immigrant communities found at the Dominion Road end of Mt Roskill. This part of Auckland is its Bible belt, so could this promise have been a desperate attempt to soothe and secure votes from disgruntled Mt Roskill residents unhappy about their non-integrating, halal-eating neighbours? Quote. Doesn’t matter, because, on the whole, Labour voters are a forgiving lot. Their heroine can do no wrong, and voters are undeterred by a poor performance so will keep voting Labour until the cows come home. So much for Ardern’s claim of transparency. So much for the CoL trying to weasel out of being held accountable. So much for 2019 being this government’s “year of delivery”. Quote. The notion of discounting a promise on the basis of not being in government is novel and new, but not credible. Full marks for originality, but this government gets a fail for performance and another fail for such a ridiculous excuse.
  9. rdytdy

    Boys get Paid

    Here is one down your way for you to pop along to Swoopa: AWAPUNI SIRES PRODUCE DAY 30 March 2019 Turbo country’s time to bring the energy. Sires Day Saturday 30th One of BGP’s original favourite race-days with the 2yo Group One Sires. The Manawatu BGP lads are putting together an event for where BGP all started and my word you’re getting some value here. The Day’s Plan Breakfast with the best Join the Little Avondale (LA) Stud team of Sam Williams along with Bevan Sweeney for a coffee and a bite to eat while we parade some horses and get some insight into the best bets for the day. The Big Go - The Courtesy Ford Awapuni Sires Produce Group 1 raceday. - 5 sponsored drinks (sponsors TBC) - Subsidised drinks all day - Lunch - Interviews between races with some local trainers and jockeys - On course BGP punters club races 2 – 8 featuring guest selectors - Band after the last until late Tickets are only $102 with $50 of each ticket going into the on course punters club so everybody has an entry. More punters club tickets can be brought on race day. The Manawatu Racing Club will also kindly donate $5 of every ticket to the BGP Foundation. Bonus Bet ⛳️ Love a bit of ‍? Friday 29th If you’re in town, The Central Districts Trainers Assn are running there annual Ambrose golf tournament at Palmerston North Golf Club. Teams of 4. Booze and food included. Team numbers are limited and this does generally sell out so contact Michael Sheridan ASAP if you wish to enter a team -he will provide further details. Friday Night the Gold Cup Festival continues with the Manawatu Trotting Cup. If previous years are anything to go buy this is a great night out. We haven’t organised an event as such here but there’s a tote, a bar and some decent harness racing so you know what to do…
  10. rdytdy


    Gubes, I recall Garry Phillips winning easily on a 2yo on debut at Trentham paying big money, so would have been a big quinella. The name escapes me as I write this but will come back later I'm sure. It was trained by Graeme Rogerson. It went out a hot favourite at it's next start at Awapuni with Garry throwing everything at it winning by a nose.
  11. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    Transcripts of our vacuous PM talking with Mike Hoskings on radio yesterday: The prime minister, Jacinda Ardern, is with us. Good morning. Jacinda Good morning. Mike Let’s start with China if we could. The implication, says Philip Burdon, former trade minister of course, and chairman of the Australia New Zealand Foundation, the implications for New Zealand are dangerous at every level. Is he right? Jacinda Oh, (indistinct) our relationship with China is incredibly important, um… economically, people to people, um… but I guess my question to him would be… um… ah… you know essentially what is he seeing here that he thinks that is putting that at risk? We are making… continuing to conduct our diplomacy and ah… place focus on our relationship with China as we… you know… as previous governments have done. At the same time facing some challenges, but in a way that I think preserves New Zealand’s independent foreign policies. Mike What are the challenges you face? Jacinda Oh, well look, there have been some questions raised. For instance, um… around the Huawei decision – actually that decision hasn’t been completed yet. We have legislation in New Zealand that was actually bought in by the last government which means that… any significant ah… question, for instance if you are going to expand into a 5G network, has to go through a process. Ah… that involves the GCSB, it’s not about the vendor, it’s agnostic as to the country, um… but it just goes through a series of checks to ensure that we preserve New Zealand’s data and security. Um… Spark put in a notice, um… GCSB have gone back to them and said, “we’ve got a couple of things we want you to mitigate”, that’s where the process is right now. Actually, that’s incredibly important. I… I wouldn’t ah… want New Zealand to step away from ah… that process. We do have to make sure we ah… protect New Zealand’s data and security, ah… and ah… so if that is the issue here then I think we have to stand by the way that – that we are doing things. Mike Why aren’t you going to China? Jacinda I… oh, again, nothing’s actually changed there. I saw a piece speculating that something had. I’ve had an invitation, we just simply haven’t set a date yet. Mike When will you set a date? Jacinda Um. I wouldn’t – I wouldn’t want to speculate on that, that only just, you know, sets up um… arbitrary time lines. It’s something that…. Mike This year? Jacinda It’s something that officials are still working on and when I spoke to them yesterday it’s still an ongoing conversation. Mike John Key went every year. Jacinda Yeah, yeah, he did. I wouldn’t actually set that expectation. For instance, you know, I haven’t been to the United States. Um… I have been to some significant um… ah… stops within Europe, um… notably because of our EU negotiations, but I wouldn’t have an expectation of visiting somewhere um… every, every, year. But as I say… Mike Not even Australia? Jacinda Oh. Oh… we have… they are our closest um… ally… Mike So, you would go to Australia, but not our biggest trading partner? Jacinda There’s a longstanding tradition, Mike, that we have an exchange where they come to us and then we go to them, and that’s been going on for some time. Um… we have, of course, the closer economic partnership. We have that with no other country. Mike Would the tradition be set by John Key who went every year, but now you’re not? Jacinda Ah… that was…. you know… John Key’s decision. I’ve got a particular way of approaching, um… foreign policy visits. I try not to be away too much, um… and so I haven’t set down an expectation that I will go to any one country. Yes, events. APEC of course, um… and I’ve had bilaterals with the premier, I’ve met the president, we’ve had a number of ministers visit China in the last year. Um, and so those exchanges are happening with our government, it’s just I don’t want to set an expectation that I go somewhere every single year. Mike Who decided in the Inland Revenue that they’d be doing political polls? Jacinda Um… yeah, they had a question… um…. I…. I… don’t know who made that decision. Certainly, the minister didn’t know. I was talking to him about it yesterday. He’d utterly no awareness. We all agree it’s totally inappropriate. Ah, the state services commissioner is making sure that all the government departments have that guidance. It just shouldn’t be happening, no question. Mike So, why would it happen? Or how did it happen? Jacinda Ah… oh… that’s a question that I’m sure the minister will be asking. It shouldn’t be happening. I’m not going to give a rationale for it because even if they had one, I would disagree with it. Mike When’s the polytech review announcement being made? Jacinda Um… imminently, very shortly. Mike What’s that mean? This week? Jacinda Imminent usually means “not too far away”. Mike Today? Jacinda Ah… I’ve got statements to the house today, the opening of parliament, so that’s…that’s going to dominate today. But it’s not too far off, Mike, particularly given of course, we flagged that it’s happening, um…trying to make sure that we have the conversations with those we need to have them with before the consultation document comes out. And just to be clear, it is us coming out with some proposals that we’ll then be talking to the sector about. Mike The reason I ask about that is that Wintech yesterday, ah… which is the Waikato Polytech did… they…they don’t seem to know how to run a business… is the polytech problem in general, from your view, a bunch of people who don’t know how to run businesses, or is the entire model broken? Jacinda The model…. The model is broken. You know, any…any um… situation, where for instance, you know… when you have um… a tight labour market you see um… decreasing enrolments and ah… a vocational training sector that struggles… um… we have competition between um… ah… a number of these ah… a number of these centres when actually we need to be focused on generating the skills that New Zealand needs. We have a shortage of builders right now. We have a shortage of people in a whole range ah… of areas and yet at the same time we have um… declining enrolment. 23,000 fewer students so there is something inherently wrong with the system which is why it is going to take quite a big shake up um… to fix and at the same time we have been having to bail them out.
  12. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    If you offended by the use of the "c" word then don't watch.
  13. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    Unemployment rises by Christie Jacinda Ardern cracking Photoshopped image credit: Luke The bad news continues for this ramshackle government. Unemployment has risen to 4.3%, from 4% in September. It may be a small increase and the government will be able to play it down as being close to the margin of error, but it is part of an emerging trend. Growth is slowing, unemployment is increasing. The economy is starting to soften and we need a competent government with strong economic management skills to guide us through the storm. We don’t have such a government. quote. Adrian Orr predicted an interest rate cut last year but there was no reason to think it necessary at that stage. After a decade of low interest rates, it seems they are about to get even lower. quote. The bad news, as always, is that the worst affected group is the young people. NEETs, as they are known, with no training, now have less and less chance of finding employment. The government claims that it will target these people, especially Maori youth, but… well, they also said they would build 1,000 houses by July 2019. quote. Sorry, Willie, but you have got this wrong. The economy is not as strong as it was. The growth numbers for the December quarter are not out yet but they are likely to show a significant slowing of growth. You can no longer rely on the excellent economy that you were handed to get you out of trouble. It is downhill all the way from here. quote
  14. rdytdy

    Jacinda Ardern

    This video was done 4 years ago and look what Socialist Cindy is doing remembering she is a UN disciple. It is very concerning indeed. It does explain why we’re going through the mill at the moment with the UN Migration Compact and the insistence on drawing refugees from the UNHCR alone – which has been going on unabated for the last few years. I think it might even explain the closing down of anything different (and effective) such as the Charter Schools, terminating gas and oil exploration, the meaningless waffle we’re subjected to, and now Jacinda’s otherwise inexplicable moral lapse in supporting abortion to term. This is just the tip of the iceberg, as we all suspect. It’s not so easy to dismiss as it might have been a while ago – and we must understand the magnitude of what we’re up against before we can stand against it. Well worth a ten minute listen.
  15. rdytdy

    Global Warming / Climate Change

    Oops, looks like ‘Ocean CleanUp’ doesn’t work by ExPFC Ocean CleanUp, sea plastic removal system You may recall reading about the Ocean CleanUp in the past but in case it’s new to you, Ocean CleanUp is a system for passively trapping the plastic waste that is in the so called Great Pacific Garbage Patch. It is a pretty ingenious system involving a floating U-shaped boom, hundreds of metres long which is designed to be abandoned in the ocean while it gets blown about by the wind and currents, casually trapping thousands of tonnes of plastic ready for later removal by a ship for recycling. The plan, which has so far cost over $20 million, was to ramp up the program with the aim to soon have around sixty of these booms floating about in the ocean, leading to 50% of the plastic being removed every five years! Prior to deployment there was nearly 300 tests, mostly computer modelled but also small-scale practical tests. Everything was going peachy and the first device, nicknamed ‘Wilson’, was taken out into the middle of the patch and let loose. You can check the ambitious project here. Unfortunately, it seems that the winds and waves way out in the middle of the ocean have never heard of computer modelling and refused to play ball. It seems that although the device does at times capture plastic, it often just flows straight back out again. The unit has been towed to Hawaii for repairs and re-evaluation. Now I think this system is pretty cool, and with a lot of further testing, time and money, they may well come up with a solution, I wish them well. What bothers me somewhat though is the blatant falsities that are bandied about in their promotional material. Take this graph for instance, apparently with their system in place, they show that by 2025, they could have the plastic levels in the GPGP back to pre 2000 levels! What utter bollocks! They could have thousands of these things out there and they will still be a literal drop in the ocean. By their own admission, the GPGP covers over 1.6 million square kilometres, that’s apparently three times the size of France. Each one of these booms has an open end of just 100 metres or so, that’s only 0.1 sq kms of area trawled for each kilometer drifted. In any case, there simply will never be enough of them to make any difference whatsoever. But at least they have managed to take some plastic out of the water on their ill-fated trial. Screenshot from the website 2000kgs of plastic! That’s not even one half filled, small rubbish truck and they admit that some of it was ghost nets. Here is the picture of one of those ghost nets being loaded onto the ship. I wonder how much this one net weighs? Ocean CleanUp Facebook page Bearing in mind that the average concentration of plastic in the GPGP is a miserly 20 odd kilograms per square kilometer, this one net being removed might’ve just cleaned up hundreds of square kilometres of ocean. But good on them, they have figured out a way to make a living taking grants from other people and, at the end of the day, there seems to be plenty of spare cash around the world for these sorts of feel-good projects. In fact I’d like to do my bit as well. With that in mind I would like to solve almost the entire, ‘oceans full of plastic’ problem. It has become apparent that there will not need to be anywhere near sixty of these units required. I reckon about ten should do it. All they have to do is place one each at the arrowed locations shown on the map below. You’re welcome. Please forward any grant monies to me via internet banking to this account number.